Burn out, Depression, Discouraged, encouragement, Inspiration, Journey, Life, Real, Strength, Weariness

Real Gets Lost In The Artificial

Just feeling….

  • Tired
  • Frustrated
  • Exhausted
  • Worn Out
  • Spent
  • Frazzled

Just wanting to…

  • Cry
  • Sleep
  • Eat your favorite comfort food
  • Take a hot shower
  • Read
  • Write
  • Take a trip
  • Escape from reality
  • Hang out with friends
  • Run away

Experience is reality…

  • Need to finish a project at work
  • Need to clean house
  • Need to get groceries
  • Need to wash laundry
  • Need to take care of the kids
  • Need to make supper
  • Need to study
  • Need to prepare for the new week

Does this sound like what you experience? Do not feel alone because your feelings are real.

This is what reality looks like and knowing this allows us to know when life gets messy it is okay because others know this experience as well.

In this day of “perfect ” social media, it is easy to loose track of what reality looks like because it gets lost in the rose colored lenses of our cameras and fancy captions we put with the images.

Anything can look good when you add fancy filters to your pictures and inauthentic captions to make them look and sound beautiful, but the “real” gets lost in the artificial .

When we look through Facebook and Instagram we can easily fall into a place where we see those images and lives as easy and “perfect” when in reality they are not. They are not because they are not “real”.

We live in the “real” and not in the “perfect”. Cling to your real and find peace in the difficult days while rejoicing during the good ones because they are there to rejuvenate and refresh you while preparing you for the difficult days when they arrive.

The reality is…

  • Life is real.
  • Life is messy.
  • Life is happy.
  • Life is difficult.
  • Life is exhilarating.
  • Life is devastating.
  • Life is joyous.
  • Life is exhausting.

Lastly, remember life is what you make of it. There are many days that are joyous while there are many that discouraging, but God gives us the strength to get through them all.

Anxiety, Discouraged, encouragement, Exhausted, Hope, Journal Journey, Journey, Life, Medical Journey, Rawness, Real

Look Up When Darkness Surrounds You

Journaling Journey

Are you finishing up a difficult night like we are?

Our night has been difficult because Kiddo had a tough one. She has not felt good all day, but despite this issue, she still had to do her weekly IgG Infusion.

She felt defeated and beat down. She struggles on nights like tonight when they are difficult. What makes it even harder is when she questions why God gave her so many health issues and I have no answers in return. All I can say is, “I do not know.”

Are you feeling beat down and defeated tonight as well? I have some simple advice for you.

“Look up when darkness surrounds you. God is waiting for you.”

@homelife&encouragement.com

This seems like a simple task, but yet it is often times very difficult.

My friend, keep your chin up and remember, tomorrow is a new day.

Have a good night and a great new tomorrow.

Bondage, Book Promotion, Brave Art of Motherhood, Broken, Challenge, Discouraged, encouragement, HL&E Designs, Journey, Life, Real, Signs, Weariness

Believe In Yourself Today

Today, I want to encourage you to, “Believe in yourself.” This simple phrase has kept coming back to me since this past weekend, and the time has come to share it with you as well.

Do you find you struggle with…

  • Thoughts of self-doubt?
  • Lack of self-confidence?
  • Lack of trust for others?
  • Believe lies you tell yourself?
  • Struggle with fear?
  • Struggle with anxiety?
  • Struggle with feelings of worthlessness

These are strong and powerful emotions and if they are not contained and corrected, over time they can become damaging and even destructive. I want you to consider as you read this which of these emotions do you struggle with? How long have you felt them? Why do you believe them and what has prevented you from breaking free from the power of their bondage? I would also like for you to think about if any of them trigger other emotions within you and what do you feel as you experience them? 

I know as I evaluate this list I struggle with lacking self-confidence which I know is triggered by the power of fear. If I was to evaluate why and what caused it I would have to look back at my childhood. I lived in a home with my single/divorced mom from the age of 5 to the age of 14, when she married my dad. I grew up in a home with a family history of a perfectionists and if you did not do everything just the “right” way, then it was not done correctly.

As a result, everything I did, and it did not matter how big or small it was, I would doubt myself and tell myself it was not good enough, it was not perfect enough, so, therefore, it did not measure up to the “perfect” test. As a result, I live my life today believing whatever I do is never done the “right” way, so therefore it is never good enough to meet the standards I was raised with.

The toughest test I had to pass was when my dad died. My husband was deployed overseas for a short deployment and my dad was in poor health, so I decided to go home in case something happened while my husband was gone. Unfortunately, my greatest concern came true. Thankfully my mom and I had discussed the “what if” scenario leading up to this time because she knew she would not be able to handle his passing well.

This turned out to be the understatement of the year. While we were making funeral arrangements with the funeral director, my mom became very sick and instead of going to the flower shop next to pick out our flowers for the funeral, I had to take Mom to the Emergency Room, at which time they admitted her into the hospital. All I could think of was what am I going to do now?

My dad died the other day, my mom is now in the hospital, today is Saturday and his funeral is on Monday. I was unable to get her doctor to commit to me that my mom would be out of the hospital in time to attend my dad’s funeral, and I had to finish planning it in case she was, but also be prepared to change all the plans if she was not. What was this going to look like for someone who struggles with a lack of self-confidence? How am I ever going to finish his funeral and get everything “perfect” to meet my mom’s expectations (because she told me countless times his funeral was going to be done perfectly)?

My lack of self-confidence ran away with me, fear held me hostage, and anxiety consumed me and somewhere in all of this was the fact I missed my dad and was grieving his loss, but that had to go on the back burner, because I had a small window of opportunity to finish planning his “perfect” funeral for my mom.

I remember so clearly that feeling of helplessness because I lacked the self-confidence to make the important decisions for fear of making a mistake and messing up. This runs my life still today. As it was, I did finish the arrangements, I got mom out of the hospital with two hours to spare before his visiting hours were to begin and I did the “best” job I knew how to do. It all came together and my mom has very few vivid memories of the details for all the medicine she was on at the time. It just means today she cannot find fault with anything I did or did not do.

Other examples in my life where I struggle are writing in my blog because everything I write has to be “perfectly” written. I struggle with being a wife and a mom. I find I must do everything the “right” way or it isn’t done properly. I try to keep my house orderly and as clean and tidy as I can with being so busy. I try to keep the yard neat and presentable because it is an outward reflection of our family. I try to keep up with all the health needs of both my husband and my daughter because this is important to me.

All of this is done with an expectation that is unrealistic for me to maintain because I lack the self-confidence it is all done right, so I just keep trying and trying and when that fails, I try harder. I understand this is seriously faulty thinking, but it was how I grew up and what I learned to believe.

I have been telling myself a lot lately, it is a good thing my mom isn’t around because if she ever saw all the shortcuts I make in my life now, I feel she would be disappointed in me. I have had to learn through the craziness of life that survival is more important to me than perfectionism. I have had to force myself to come to terms with the fact perfectionism is not healthy. No one can possibly live up to the standards I have spent years placing upon myself. I have a long way to go and I am sure if you were to ask my family if I have conquered this they would loudly say, no, but I am determined to bring a sense of self-confidence into my life.

Does any of this sound familiar to you? Do you struggle with deep down and often times hidden emotions that lead you to where you are struggling today?

My friend, I have hope for you. You do not have to live in this bondage any longer. You can choose to change this game and move past it. You can learn a new way of living and be happy with who you have always wanted to become. You can break the chains that have held you captive. 

The first step to making this change is to identify the leading cause for everything you have experienced and identify why you have not allowed yourself the freedom before now to flee from it.

I want to share this quote from my friend, Rachel Marie Martin’s new book, “The Brave Art of Motherhood”. There are many life lessons I have learned by reading this book, but this quote is the one I am going to use for this blog post.

The lesson I have learned through examining my own life is that I have allowed fear to have power over my ability to change what I did not like.

“Fear is a stifling voice of the unknown. It takes self-confidence to muster the courage to unearth the fears holding you back. It takes faith to examine the fears and replace the fallacy of most fears with truth.”  – Rachel Marie Martin 

I have learned fear has stifled my self-confidence and I lacked the faith to break free for the bondage it held me at. I believed all the faulty thinking and believed I had to live this way and accept it even though I did not like it.

My friend, you do not have to do this either. You do not have to allow fear to hold you captive to the things you struggle with. I want you to examine your life and determine if the power of fear is the holding you back from living your life to your fullest? Has it held you back from following your dreams and achieving your goals? If it has, please take the time to first, 

“BELIEVE IN YOURSELF!” 

Secondly, I want you to tell yourself that you will not be controlled by fear any longer and that you will battle those lies you have believed for years and in the end, I want you to believe and have the faith you will rise above it all and stand taller and stronger than anything you have allowed yourself to believe in before. 

Lastly, My Friend, I can not emphasize this concept enough…

“Believe in Yourself!”

*Disclaimer – if you would like to purchase the above sign, it is available for purchase on our HL&E Designs FaceBook Page (via our VIP Group page, to access this group you simply like our HL&E Designs page and request to join our VIP Group) or you can access us via our Instagram Page @HL&E Designs. Links to these pages are available along the sidebar. Click on the link and you will be able to place an order at that time as well as pay for them too. We accept PayPal via hlandedesigns@outlook.com.

 

 

Journey, Life

Prepare or Evacuate

Just my 2 cents…. evacuating is not an easy choice to make. Every family has logistics that are unique to their family. Not everyone has a never ending paycheck or savings account.

Not everyone lives where there is someone to go stay with. In this storm going West is not an option unless you go 12-16 hours inland.

Many have pets that need to be considered into the evacuation plan and not everyone has family or friends who can take on additional pets to help you. Many hotels still do not accept them and hotels are in a shortage when millions of people are in need of them.

So to all of those who sit back and advice people to “just evacuate” please keep your opinions to yourself unless you are willing to physically, monetarily, or emotionally assist and get dirty. (This is not intended for those I talked to last night, I know you love me.)

Please reserve the name calling for a different time and venue as well. This IS NOT THE TIME to make those who have to make critical decisions feel any less than they already feel knowing if they leave home, they may not have one to return to.

Life is trying to continue on as this ugly storm approaches and as we prepare or evacuate.

For my prayer warriors, family and friends, pray me the wisdom and guidance to know what to do. Pray me the peace and assurance I need when I have made this important and critical decision.

Prayers are appreciated!!!